I am Castiel, formerly a god and formerly an Angel of the Lord, but still very much an angel.

I once housed all of the souls of Purgatory within my vessel, but they were ripped out of me by an unknown ritual about a thousand years from now. And now, I don't even have my own soul.

AIM: soullessserenade

OOC: This is a AU!Soulless Castiel blog. Not part of the Ask!Verse or any group.

May contain NSFW content. Will be tagged 'nsfw'.

(Source: the-amaziing-2ollux)

theswansongsituation:

Dean rubs his face as every joke is completely misunderstood by his mate. He’d have to work harder on Castiel’s pop-culture education. The angel spreads his fingers to look through them to Gabriel who is returning his disbelieving look. If nothing else the one thing they had in common was their incredulousness at Castiel’s social ineptitude.

It’s Dean’s turn to act confused and feel out of the loop as Cas starts making strange but comforting noises at their son. It seems to amuse everyone but him as both angels are looking at the fledgling affectionately. Not one to ask questions if he’s being deliberately excluded he ignores it.

“Don’t call him that,” Dean cries out with mock indignation.  Gabriel snorts at his son-in-laws over-dramatics but there is no ill-will between them. “I’m not sure, I just don’t want to sit around all day and for once it isn’t raining. We could go walk through the market on the river or eat our way through the street food stalls. I don’t care. Daddy needs a day out.”

He laughs, trying to hide his urgency without downplaying that it was important to him. Dean had been cooped up in one house or another for the duration of his and Castiel’s break and he needed to get out. Then there was the gift, he would rather give it to his mate someplace special, not that their house wasn’t, but someplace they’d remember for all eternity. Because with any luck they’d live that long.

“Come on, get ready!” He waves his arms at Cas and Gabe, relieving his mate of their son so he could do whatever he needed before they left. He tucked him in his sling so his hands were free to throw some lenses and baby supplies in a bag. Call Dean a hippie, call him going soft, but call him creative in making sure no one spied baby angel wings on accident. “You coming, Gabe?”

He hops on one foot to pull on his running shoes, feet feeling strange after wearing nothing or flip flops for so long. It was just one more sign of how much this life was changing him. He was armed to the teeth for baby pictures but there wasn’t a corporeal weapon on him. As he balances on the other foot he can feel the small gift bouncing in his pocket and a new wave of earnestness washes over him.

“Angel air or the bikes?” he calls out, adjusting Ike and trying to wait patiently for the others to indicate they’re ready.

Gabriel takes note of Dean’s confusion and waves him off.  ”It’s a Castiel thing.  I doubt he even knows that he’s making the sound, but it’s something he does to show love when he doesn’t know what to say,” the archangel explains and dries his hands on a nearby towel.  

Castiel suddenly looks up and glares at Gabriel as his cheeks flush in embarrassment.  ”I know when I make the sound…” he retorts, but it fades away and Castiel sighs softly, holding Ike close to his heart until he sees Dean coming closer.  

“What’s rushing you, babe?  It’s like you’re supercharged and just raring to go,” the dark angel says with a chuckle as he reluctantly relinquishes his hold on their son and hops out of his seat.  

“I guess we need to let Mommy out of the nest more often, right Ike?” Castiel laughs and runs up the stairs to avoid any retaliation that may come from Dean.

As soon as Castiel is gone, Gabriel arches a brow and looks to Dean.  ”I’d love to go and hang out with you and the boys, but shouldn’t this be more of a private occasion?” he asks as he looks down at the pocket Dean seems to be so focused on.  ”So, maybe another time.  Just make sure you invite me to ceremony if you pop the big question,” Gabriel says with a grin and waves a good bye to Ike before he vanishes.

Castiel walks back down the stairs a few minutes after Gabriel’s left.  ”Where’s father?” he asks as he adjusts his tee and running shoes.  To be honest, he’s surprised he even has shoes in this house after wearing flip flops for so long.  

The dark angel pauses as he looks to his mate and then he suddenly breaks out in laughter seeing him laden down with the sling and the camera bag.  ”Babe, I think you forgot the diaper bag,” he says with another round of laughter at how ridiculous Dean looks already.  He’s definitely packing too much for just a day trip.

He wipes away a tear and sighs happily.  ”Bikes should be fine, but pick just one camera and two extra lenses, babe.  We don’t need the paparazzi’s arsenal,” he says as he relieves Dean of the bag and sets it on the ground gently.

theswansongsituation:

Dean cannot tell if they have been talking about him or not. Gabe is actually doing the dishes by hand and he maybe scrubbing a pot a bit too hard to have not just admitted to something. The angel shrugs it off, not really caring one way or the other. What can he possibly do? Nothing puts a damper on a newly mended relationship like having to say you murdered your partner’s father.

“Y’all look like a frigging Rockwell painting,” Dean announces his return by grabbing one of his omnipresent cameras and snapping a shot of Isaac and Cas playing with the lion, Gabe in the background scrubbing a bacon grease coated baking sheet.

He settles back on the bar stool at the island, tucking bare feet under him in a crosslegged position, facing his son and mate. Besides giving them time together Dean had not thought of something to do for Cas. An idea has struck him a few times but he’s not sure how to go about it without sounding terribly cheesy. Cas thinks he’s sweet when he’s being cheesy though, so it might just work.

With a thought one of the pockets on his shorts becomes a fraction heavier as his small token for Castiel settles there. He smiles as Isaac watches the lion, leaning in to make roaring noises himself and nuzzle at the infants stomach, causing fits of laughter.

“I should be taking pictures,” Gabe chortles, placing the last dish on the drying rack and throwing the towel over his shoulder. “Most feared hunter on the planet and now he’s reduced to Blue’s Clues.”

Dean shoots his father-in-law an unamused look but his eyes are crinkling with laughter. “Know many monsters, do you?” He asks as he turns back to kiss Cas on the lips before nosing Ike’s stomach. “Tell him we don’t care, Ike. I’ll kill ‘em, I’ll kill em all dead.”

He straightens on his seat and unhooks his legs from under him. They swing a little underneath him, his excitement growing at the prospect of giving Cas his gift. “So we going out or are we sitting around all day?

Castiel blinks away the spots in his vision after Dean’s taken another photo.  He frowns faintly, but lets it go in favor of asking a question, “Who’s Rockwell?  Is he famous?”  Of course, even after all this time, Castiel will still ask the obvious questions and won’t understand all of Dean’s references, no matter how hard he tries to learn them.

After Dean sits in his seat, Castiel relaxes, forgetting about the reference as he picks up the lion and gives it to Ike, who immediately puts the poor creature’s head into his mouth.  But Castiel carefully takes away the toy as he hears Dean’s roaring and he knows what happens next.  The angel laughs alongside his family, enjoying the sounds that warm his heart no matter how down he may be.

“Are you trying to be a photographer or a journalist?” Castiel asks his father as a joke and laughs as the only reply he gets is a blink and the innocent tilt of an archangel’s head.  The angel honestly pouts until he’s suddenly kissed by his mate and then he laughs again.  For the time being, he’s given up on trying to understand all the references and jokes that are going over his head.

He sighs softly and relaxes as he watches Dean and Ike interact, the fledgling already gurgling and reaching out for his daddy to grab him.  

Ike can’t really reach him or even understand what his daddy is saying, but the infant is gurgling happily nonetheless and having a grand time having his tummy being tickled.

Castiel looks to Dean, smiling happily, though he is curious about his mate’s apparent excitement.  He tilts his head and makes a soft sound that Gabriel reacts to, recognizing it as a sound of affection that Castiel would make as a fledgling.  Gabriel remembers his mate absolutely loving that sound and trying to encourage their son to make more, which he gladly did.

“We’re heading out, of course,” Gabriel answers for Castiel, “So, where are you two lovebirds headed with the chick?”

theswansongsituation:

“It’s digital, dufus.” Dean teases as he’s suddenly relieved of his son from his arms. Isaac is probably fussing from his spit up earlier, unaffected by the horseplay between his dad and grandfather but Dean stops all the same. Cas’ irritation is evident and like Ike he’s innocent of anything that happened between Gabe and himself years ago.

“Hey, babe, it’s okay,” Dean tries to console his mate, reaching out with his now free arm to rub on Castiel’s as he holds their child. “Grampa and I are just goofing off, right?”

His gaze turns back to the archangel, camera now on the counter. He gives him a look that dares him to disagree and Gabriel nods slowly as he speaks. “I thought you’d have learned by now that you have to give this muttonhead a hard time to show you care, Cassy.”

Dean gives Cas a tight lipped smile, trying not to let the aggravation of being called yet another name seep into his face. Gabriel is his mate’s father and he’s not going to cause Cas any more strife by messing with him but all is not forgiven and they’re going to have to have a heart to heart about it eventually. Even if their kind of heart to heart was likely to involve swords.

The angel gets up and moves to stand behind his mate and wraps his arms around Cas and Isaac. He presses his forehead to his son’s whose chin his resting on the darker angel’s shoulder. Giving them both a squeeze he whispers into Cas’ ear, “If he doesn’t tell you I will.”

He peels himself away after giving Issac’s head and Cas’ neck a quick kiss each. Heading to the direction of the stairs he calls behind him, “Gramps, you should do clean up since Cas cooked, I’m going to get Ike’s stuff and a shirt.”

He’s only gone for a few minutes before returning, trying to glean if they’ve been talking about him in his absence.

Gabriel rolls his eyes at Dean’s weak insult, but smirks and nods his head nonetheless when the former hunter tries to get his cooperation and confirmation.  ”Yeah, sure.  Won’t happen again, Cassy.  Archangel’s honor,” he says with a smile and crosses his heart, though it’s more of a show than a sign of a promise.  After all, the future is uncertain, especially when it concerns one Dean Winchester.  He then continues to speak and Castiel sighs heavily at the insult to his mate.  

“Of course,” Castiel murmurs, not really believing either of them, but he finishes his breakfast and tea, somehow managing to keep Ike under control enough so that most of his tea actually goes into his mouth and not up his nose.

The dark angel purses his lips as he senses Dean’s intentions and feelings.  They’re faint and not perfectly clear to Castiel, but he gets the idea and bows his head.  But Castiel chooses to ignore them and instead whispers words of love and praise to Ike, telling him how strong he is and how he’s going to grow up to be a very strong angel just like Papa and Daddy when he’s all grown up.  

A smile lights up Castiel’s expression as he feels Dean wrap his arms around himself and Ike.  He relishes the closeness, the warmth shared between them.  But he pauses as he hears Dean’s whispered words, frowning as he wonders what they mean, though he knows they’re directed at his father.

“Tell me what?” he asks, but Dean’s already gone.  Castiel turns his question to his father next and frowns, repeating “Tell me what?”

Gabriel scratches the back of his head, reluctant expression on his face telling Castiel that his father obviously doesn’t want to talk about this.  But the younger angel presses for the information and stares at his father with a stern frown.

“Alright, alright,” Gabriel finally relents after a bitch face is thrown his way, “Short story short, I may have killed your boy toy a couple hundred times in Florida a couple of years before you met him.  I brought him back every time.  No real harm done, except to Sam’s psyche, but I was trying to teach him a lesson.  I mean, hello?  Trickster?”

It’s Castiel’s turn to roll his eyes after hearing his father’s story.  ”I trust you won’t be playing anymore tricks on my mate or his family?” Castiel asks with a tilt of his head and smiles as he receives a positive nod from his father, “Good.”

By the time Dean returns, Gabriel is dutifully hand-washing the dishes and Castiel and Ike are playing with the silver lion together, the infant laughing as the miniature creature gives a loud roar.

theswansongsituation:

“Actually I know exactly what that feels like,” Dean looks up at the archangel and tilts his head slightly. “But you’d know how I know wouldn’t you? That’s one of those really interesting stories you should tell your son someday.”

The angel isn’t going to bring up that hellish time in Florida now. If Gabe doesn’t explain it to his son then Dean will do it later. His memory was still fuzzy on the incident but he knows Sammy remembers every excruciating detail. Cas’ nervous eating doesn’t go unnoticed and as Dean gets up to retrieve his lens he presses a kiss to his mate’s temple offering support and reassurances through their bond.

Dean busies himself with different lenses and half paying attention to his father-in-law. He had been being sarcastic when he said he wanted to document Gabe coming over and now he was a little hurt that he had been when Dean wasn’t around. There is no way he is going to give Gabe the pleasure of seeing him show his hurt so he doesn’t bring it up. Instead he sits back down with his equipment and takes to the difficult task of balancing his son on his thigh and putting together one of his cameras.

The tawny angel looks up at the archangel, daring him to open his mouth. When his food is taken he simply pushes the plate closer to Gabriel then raises his camera to get some unattractive shots of him shoving his food in his mouth. Of course he has the flash set to the highest setting and at the close distance causes Gabe to blink rapidly.

“Go on take it,” Dean offers, voice ripe with contempt. “Maybe you can just hit the big reset button and get me some more.”

“Oh, Dean-o are you pregnant again because you sure have a bad case of hormones?” Gabriel chides, causing Dean to go read with anger. He takes a deep breath and pushes the camera closer to the archangels face, rapid firing the flash as he turns to Castiel.

“I want to take Ike out today, in the city,” he starts with a smile, begging his mate to notice how well he’s doing despite the fact he wants to choke his father-in-law. “Sound good to you?”

Castiel’s nerves only become more frazzled as he sees how quickly relations between Dean and his father are falling apart.  He doesn’t want this to happen.  The angel wanted them to be one big, happy family.  But at this rate, it might just turn into an ugly brawl.

And the angel frowns, having no idea what Dean is talking about and Gabriel’s expression certainly isn’t giving anything away either.  ”What is he-” he starts to ask, but is cut off by Gabriel with a “We’ll discuss this later.”

The dark angel only purses his lips, hardly relaxing with the kiss or the reassurances he feels through their bond from Dean.  But Castiel does try to relax outwardly and continue eating his breakfast.

“Ow!  Hey, stop that!  Play nice, Dean-o!” Gabriel hisses as he’s blinded by flash after flash, the sensation unpleasant no matter what manner of being he may be.  ”Thought you’d rather use the film on Cas or the baby.”

“Please, both of you, stop.  Just stop.  Ike doesn’t need to see or feel any of this,” Castiel suddenly growls, protective hen mode kicking in as he scoops up Ike into his arms and shoulders him while Dean shoves the camera in his father’s face.

Castiel sighs heavily and pinches the bridge of his nose, trying to relieve some of his stress.  ”Yes.  Fine.  The city sounds great.  Anything to get you two to just stop,” he says with a sigh and rubs Ike’s back gently, trying to get the fussing infant to calm down.  

theswansongsituation:

“Don’t. Do that.” Dean brandishes his now empty hand at the archangel. He peels himself away from Castiel, holding their son on bent arm. The intrusion seems to go unnoticed by Isaac, who despite upchucking all over his Papa is happily cooing and pummeling Dean’s ear with a tiny fist. He returns to his seat, only half listening to the verbal assault he is receiving from Gabriel.

He turns Isaac around in his lap so he’s sitting facing the counter and his grandfather. Dean is trying to eat and keep wondering hands out of his food as Isaac’s hand-eye coordination is improving steadily. His fork is nearly grabbed out of his hand as he attempts to snag a forkful of waffle.

“Yeah, thanks by the way, for coming and letting me know what great shape Cas was in,” Dean sarcastically drawls as he rolls his eyes and places a finger in his son’s own so at least one of his hands is occupied. He leans forward and shoves nearly an entire waffle in his mouth, looking up at Gabe with an unimpressed look. He doesn’t bother swallowing before he’s opening his mouth to speak again, not caring for manners at the moment. “And thanks for dropping by unannounced and bringing it up again, cause we were not trying to move on or anything.”

Dean isn’t really that put off by Gabriel dropping by. If anything he likes the idea that the family is more extended and he wishes Sammy and Bobby possessed the power to get here so quickly. He knows he’s changed and he doesn’t care. Let someone say something about how soft he’s gotten and they’ll feel the sharpness of his sword.

“Nothing’s changed with you,” Gabe spits, obviously not caring that he’s being half ignored by the angel who is more enthralled with his food and his son. “You still think everyone around you owes you something, like they’re supposed to consider everything in it’s relevance to Dean fucking Winchester.”

Dean pulls off the crust of his toast and offers it to Ike but the baby turns his head in disgust. “Don’t curse in front of the baby, gramps.” He pops the crust in his mouth and chews giving Gabe his best ‘I’m stabbing you with my mind’ look.

He looks around the counter and spins on the stool, searching the living room for the extra components for his camera. “Where’s my portrait lens? We should document the time Grampa actually came to see his grandson.”

“Sorry if I didn’t want to leave his side just in case he died while I was away.  here’s nothing worse than dying alone, in case you didn’t know that,” the archangel growls, his anger flaring at Dean’s accusations and assumptions of him.  Yes, Gabriel might be an incredibly poor example of an angel, but he still knew familiar duty and making sure Castiel wasn’t alone was a huge priority for Gabriel.

Gabriel finally lets his guard down as Dean just takes the verbal abuse.  The archangel sighs heavily, admitting defeat, though he’s very reluctant to and on occasion still throws an evil eye towards Castiel’s mate.  ”Make fun of me as much as you want, Winchester, but just because I don’t visit when you’re around, doesn’t mean I don’t visit at all,”the honey haired archangel retorts.

Castiel’s eyes widen slightly and he looks away as he shoves a couple strips of bacon into his mouth in hope of avoiding being brought into this conversation.  Nonetheless he will be and the dark angel can do little to fight against this.

“I think the lens is in the box with the rest of your camera equipment,” Castiel says as picks up a cup of tea.  He drinks from the small cup and then fidgets slightly, as if nervous.

Gabriel takes note of the fidgeting, but makes no mention of it.  ”Alright.  Fine.  We’ll have a family photo.  Commemorate the first time we all get to be in the same room together,” the trickster says with a smirk and steals a few strips of bacon from Dean’s plate.